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Names That Stick | 12.29.00
This piece isn't contemptuous or anything; it's more humor rather than disdain, but maybe some things in here do end up being used in a sardonic manner. If Charles Dickens wrote A Tale of Two Cities, I don't see why I shouldn't be able to write A Tale of Two Ken Chens, or at least the tale of how they've acquired their nicknames. In my grade, there are two Chinese kids both named Ken Chen. Well, one is actually Kenneth Chen and the other is Kenny Chen, but they both end up as Ken Chen on most papers, causing mass confusion. How do most of their peers address this problem? Through distinct nicknames that have their own little tale. Coincidentally, I happened to be around for the birth of both nicknames. I remember the image of Kenneth Chen getting onto the school bus each morning when we were in middle school. He was a small, skinny kid, but one thing was obvious - his head was BIG. There was a cool kid who sat all the way in the back of the bus who would always scream out - Ken has a BIG HEAD! each morning. Ken would sit all the way in the front, so I guess he probably never heard it, or if he did, he ignored it. The cool kid would then proceed to put a thumb in his mouth and pretend to blow on it. Then he would use his hands to indicate that his head was growing bigger. Everyone in the back would have a good laugh about it and that was the routine each day in middle school. As I got to know Ken better in person through classes, I ceased in calling him Kenneth or Ken - he was Big Head. The name caught on quick and by high school, he was simply known as BH. Cruel? Perhaps, but each day, we never get enough laughs about the HEAD. The meaning of Kenny Chen's nickname covers a broader range. He looks like the lead singer guy of 98 degrees, but Chinese and with acne. I would say he's a fairly popular guy, being our school president and all, but having said that, the origin and meaning of his nickname may be contrary. I was on the freshman basketball team with Kenny Chen and as a regular on the bench, I got to observe Kenny in action. Kenny was a talented ball player; he could shoot and dribble very well. But, he didn't know how to pass. Well, maybe he did, but he never showed that he could. Some of his game antics were taking off for a layup from the freethrow line, turning the ball over, taking too many shots, etc. Our team only hoped that he would stop f*cking the game up all the time. Out of frustration, a few other kids and I would yell "Ken f*cking Chen!" Soon, I realized that the profanity could be spared and Kenny could just be called KFC. The name fit him as snug as a custom-made glove. He not only f*cked things up in basketball; he was good at messing up projects, plans, etc. Well, maybe he's outgrown the name now, being our school's president and everything, but then again, maybe he's f*cking things up with that at this very moment! But it's a very catchy name and there's even a fast-food place named after him! Well, those are the two short tales of how the Ken Chens came to be known as Big Head and KFC. They probably dislike the usage of such names, but then again, it gives them distinct identities. Oh yeah, and one more thing about KFC - he once tried to play it off as Ken Fantastic Chen - HA! He can be quite funny sometimes. |
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