Who says salads are only for girls? Today, after managing to stay awake for most of my United States History lecture (I love learning more about the Great Depression), I made my way to Labyrinth Books on 112th St., where I purchased an overpriced $7.95 Hackett version of Hegel's Introduction to the Philosophy of History. Seeing that I had some time before my next class, I decided to buy myself lunch. Last night, I had foolishly consumed three Krispy Kreme donuts in place of a real, substantive dinner. Feeling the guilt of such a sugary indulgence, I decided to compensate with a salad my midday meal.
I soon found myself waiting on line at Nussbaum&Wu, a pastry/deli next to the Korean restaurant Mill. The salad bar in the back was manned by a Mexican dude who took asked each customer which toppings he or she wanted. He took all the toppings and the dressing and tossed it in a big metal bowl. He then funneled the mix into a plastic bowl. I waitied in line and saw what each of the three girls in front of me got. Their choices were diverse as some opted for a few cheeses and some vegetables while others loaded vegetables and took no meat. I wondered what choices I would make, but realized it was silly to think hard about it, especially when I had the luxury of "unlimited toppings." I looked back and saw that everyone behind me were also girls. I became a little self-conscious being the only guy around. Well, no big deal, I'm eating salad, not tossing it, I tried joking to myself for some self-assurance.
When my turn finally came, I started way in the corner with the broccoli. "Ok, so... broccoli; let's have the peppers, the corn, the peas, the sun-dried tomatoes, the asparagus, the American cheese, the olives - just the black ones, the bean sprouts, some sunflower seeds, the crutons, the pasta, the carrots... yeah, and that orange-looking thing. Chicken and some of those noodles. Okay, let me get raspberry dressing on that." Before long, I realized I took up the $5.95 offer of "unlimited toppings" on the sign above. The Mexican guy took out a plastic bowl to put in the freshly mixed salad but soon saw that the bowl wasn't big enough to accomodate the plethora of toppings. The blonde girl standing behind me giggled while I wondered what would happen with the surplus salad. Assuming they would throw the rest out, I took the plastic bowl and started walking towards the counter. Just then, the Mexican guy called for me and handed me another bowl with the rest of the salad. Pleasantly surprise, I took my two bowls to the counter and promptly told the lady there, "This is just for one salad." I paid my $5.95 and left Nussbaum&Wu, eating from one bowl while carrying another full one.
I no longer felt self-conscious for eating "healthy" or "like a girl." I had, by a natural course, brought a masculine approach to assembling a salad. The right combination of vegetables? Psh. The perfect dressing and cheese coordination? Whatever. I never thought long and hard about which toppings to get, and when my turn finally came, the choices were made on impulse - ok, that looks good, add; that too, add; yeah, some more.... and the best feeling was knowing that I had eaten more vegetables in one sitting than I had in the entire previous month. Even better, my roommate Rene got to comment on all that "green shit" floating in the toilet later in the day.
